How To Get Anyone To Say ‘’Yes”.
So you wish this girl would go out with you but you don’t know how to get her to say yes?
Say no more because you have come to the right place… ish.
Wait…, hold on.
If I’m mad about marketing why am I giving relationship advice?
Well this post isn’t completely focused on winning girls over [notice I said completely]. But we will definitely be discussing how to win anyone over.
This post is centered on marketing and will be identifying the (6) psychological principles that directs human behavior which gives us the ability to manipulate others without the appearance of manipulation.
RECIPROCATION
1.
When you do someone a favour [even as little as buying a bottle of Coke], it creates a sense of indebtedness on the receiving party. Research has shown that you don’t even have to be liked or known by the receiving party. All you just have to do is choose your nature of the indebting first favour and let the nature of the debt-canceling return the favour back to you at your will.
How can this be of any use?
1.) Uninvited gifts even welcome more pay back. For instance, people find it difficult to accept a free sample from always-smiling attendants and just walk away. Instead, they buy some of the product, even if they might not have liked it so well.
"So one evening in traffic this guy driving beside me stops his car, honks at me and offers me a space in front of him since his lane was moving faster. I was flattered because I didn’t ask and that hardly ever happens. Unknown to me, this guy followed me all the way to my estate which was a 15 minutes drive from our meeting point. So I parked because he kept on honking for me to slow down. I was just thinking it was a coincidence that we stayed in the same estate until he told me he drove all the way to meet me. He asked for my card so he could call me up some other time, I wanted to say no so bad but his influence had worked on me, remember he gave me a space on his moving lane without me asking [uninvited gift]."
2.) Reciprocation also allows for unfair exchanges which means a small initial favour can produce a sense of obligation to agree to a larger return of favour. Women frequently feel a sense of obligation to return the favour of a man who has given them an expensive gift or paid for their drinks at the club.
3.) This is where it gets better as I saved the best for the last. Suppose you want me to agree to a certain request. One way to increase your chances would be first to make a larger request of me, one that I will most likely turn down. Then after I have refused, you would make the smaller request that you were really interested in all along. The larger the initial request, the more effective the procedure, but if the first set of demands is so extreme as to be seen as unreasonable, the tactic backfires (so be careful).
This is just basic negotiation procedure so you need to think of something so extravagant to ask that girl that's way out of your league and when she says no pitch in your initial intention.
Another example of this would be if you are being turned down by someone then obtain referrals – friends and family that might be interested in your offer (applies to door-to-door sales).
COMMITMENT AND CONSISTENCY
2.
If I can get you to make a commitment, there is a natural tendency to behave in ways that are stubbornly consistent with your commitment. No matter how little the commitment, we all fool ourselves from time to time to keep our thoughts and beliefs consistent with what we have already decided. You stay in that relationship [even with all the cheating] because you have posted your entire love life on Instagram [making a public commitment].
On a more marketing note, how do we get people to commit?
Writing is believing. If I can get you to go on record in a competition to state to liking my product just because there are attractive prizes attached that you have little chance of winning I can get you to be consistent with buying my product. The participants tend to praise the product to increase their slight chances of winning. Whenever one takes a stand that is visible to others, there arises a drive to maintain that stand in order to look like a consistent person. This is because if otherwise they could be judged as fickle by society. This means public commitments tend to be lasting commitments.
SOCIAL PROOF
3.
When in Rome act like Romans or in plain terms this principle just means peer pressure. People are persuaded more by the actions of others than by any proof we can offer.
If you are a commercial blogger, it is better to have no proof than low proof. This is because when people come across your page and they see low social media counts, they begin to think of your work as less trustworthy.
You are better off as a marketer when you inform your customers that your product is the “fastest growing” or “largest-selling” because you don’t have to convince them directly that the product is good, they need only see that many others think so.
LIKING
4.
If asked, we would always prefer to say yes to the requests of someone we know and like. But what we don’t know is that total strangers can get us to comply with their requests as well. Marketers [or even anyone] are total strangers and can walk their way into the likeness of customers.
What are the factors that can cause one person to like another?
1.) Physical attractiveness: Good-looking people have an advantage in social interaction. Attractive people are more likely to obtain help in need and more persuasive in changing the opinions of an audience.
2.) Similarity: We are more likely to help those who dress like us. People can manipulate their ways to increase liking by claiming they have background and interests similar to ours. Research shows that people are more likely to buy insurance when salesperson is like them in such areas as age, religion, politics and cigarette-smoking habits.
3.) Compliments: We all love compliments even when they are not true. But be careful not to push it so you don’t seem creepy. We are phenomenal suckers for flattery, although there are limits to our gullibility especially when we can tell the flatterer is trying to manipulate us. But customers love compliments.
AUTHORITY
5.
We tend to follow authority figures as our actions are frequently more influenced by a title than by the nature of the person claiming it. People respect the title PhD. or M.B.A. even much more than the content of such person carrying the title.
If you have seen the movie 'Let’s be Cops' or 'Catch me if You can' you would agree with me when I say people respect you with your clothing. Clothing appears to be much more tangible than a title.
People tend to fall for ads that use experts to sell the products. But make sure these experts are popularly known and accepted for this role (say an actor).
Also by admitting the faults in your product smartly would make people succumb easily. For example, L’Oreal: A bit more expensive and worth it. Avis: We’re number two, but we try harder. Mention a small shortcoming in your product, though the drawback is secondary it’s easily overcome by more significant advantages.
SCARCITY
6.
Scarcity is like playing hard to get because you want the other party to crave more of your attention. The opportunities seem more valuable to us when their availability is limited. As opportunities become limited, we lose freedom and we hate to lose freedom we already have.
Not only do we want something when it is scarce, we want it most when we realize we are in competition for it.
When you are a mean girl and you realize the new girl at your school has a crush on your ex boyfriend…
When the customer is informed that a certain product is in short supply that can’t be guaranteed to last long, they tend to want it more. The intent is to convince customers of an item’s scarcity and thereby increase its immediate value in their eyes. The purpose of this is to scare people into thinking they can’t have it later, which makes them want it more and immediately.
Final words,
This post is a book review solely sourced from one of my best books of all time called Influence by Robert Cialdini. I say this because I have never felt so much ‘AHA’ moments all in one place. It even had subtle humour, what a thrill
Have a Nice Ad,
Wura.